The Body

We dived out of the London, morning sunlight and in through the doorway, took the lift down to the basement and made our way through to the meeting point. We were then met with the words, “Have you brought a body?” My friend gestured toward me and said, “This is the body.”

I can honestly say that I have been referred to as many things in my time but never as a body. However, I was a willing volunteer and the other ‘bodies’ and I did all that was required of us for the remainder of the day. Together, we made up a mock class for my friend and her colleagues who were sitting their practical, Pilates Instructors' exam.  I do believe that I was the only ‘Pilates virgin’ and had to confess that no, I hadn’t received the e-mail link to the exercises that I was supposed to have been practising. Although when I googled Pilates to read up a little more about it, all manner of ‘interesting’ websites popped up.  Apparently Pilates helps with all kinds of activities! 

Everyone looked very fit and toned although who can tell for sure just by the exercise gear? I’ve been known to put my gym gear on at 7am and still not have made it to the gym by 10pm at night but have felt fitter and more ‘in shape’ just because I am disguised as a fitness nut. Others also see your sporting attire and assume that you are a fitness expert. However, the assorted bodies gathered together did look relatively toned. There was a wide age range of participants and the oldest person in the class was a 70+ year old woman and she was pretty impressive despite carrying an injury!  All I can say is, 'I hope I am as flexible as her when I’m that age.'

So, after several classes where the trainees demonstrated their teaching skills, I can honestly say that I enjoyed the experience and found the classes pretty relaxing.  Although, I find that most activities not involving children (mine or anyone elses’) are relatively tranquil. I became quite good at holding my body with a neutral spine, could do the cat and the swan and the other animals that I can’t really remember now.  I just had one wobbly moment when at the exact same time the words, ‘Good balance everyone,’ were still hanging from the instructor’s mouth, I overbalanced and lunged forward onto my mat. Stifling a snort, I fell back into formation and tried to pretend like I’d meant to do a lunge at that particular moment. I also learned how to take my pelvic floor muscles from the ground floor right up to the top floor and back down again one floor at a time through all 10 floors. This is a skill that should be repeated often, especially by women who have had several babies. In my case, seeing as I have had 4 children, I should be doing these exercises around the clock to avoid ‘embarrassing’ lapses later on in life.

I decided to put some of the exercises into practise in my everyday life. My journeys to work each morning will never be the same and I have had to adjust my rear view mirror to allow for the rise and falls which accompany the 'elevator moves'. I was concentrating so hard on my exercises one morning last week that I burst out laughing at myself. This coincided with me pulling up at traffic lights, where two workmen in hardhats were just about to cross the road. They took my guffawing to mean I was grinning profusely at them and they in turn gave me the old ‘wehey’ smiles, winks and waves back. As soon as the lights turned, I, the colour of a beetroot, sped off and decided to can my pelvic floor exercises for the rest of the journey.

I’m thinking that I should find a local Pilates class and practise all my exercises in a ‘safe’ environment, far from workmen’s prying eyes, and under the expert tutelage of a professional. I’m all for tightening up my various muscles and relaxing others. The senior citizen from London commented that she could tell from my position on the exercise mat that my shoulder muscles were incredibly tight and that I was holding a lot of tension in my neck. Too right love, live my life for 24 hours and you’d have shoulder stress too. I thought of asking if she also had a masseuse diploma to go with her Pilate’s expertise and then perhaps she could give me a massage during the break but instead I said sweetly, “Yeah, I think my shoulders are a little tight.”

All in all, it was a fun trip and I thoroughly enjoyed meeting up with my friend, who came over especially from Switzerland to take the assessment. Despite my wobbly moment, which no one seemed to notice or probably more accurately, chose not to draw attention to, I don’t think it was too obvious that I was a complete notice. I even got a note from my friend, the day after returning home, saying, ‘The best body anyone could ask for’.